So, what do you look out for?

In adults you want to keep an eye out for;
temperatures too high or too low
rapid heartrate
fast breathing

In children, parents need to be aware of;
feeling cold to touch
mottled, bluish or pale skin
breathing fast
fits of convulsions
not urinating for longer than 12 hours
floppy, weak and buging soft spots

1 in 4 NHS trusts are failing to treat sepsis in time. This is a cause close to my heart, because during the delivery of my daughter I suffered from sepsis, as did my daughter. I was induced on a Monday afternoon and decided to go home and wait for contractions to start. Around 6am Tuesday morning, we went back to the hospital as I was experiencing pains in a pattern and noticed I had slightly wet underwear (TMI). I went to the triage unit where they said I still hadn’t dilated and my waters had not gone, despite my observation. I was put back onto the ward and received observations periodically and the induction process continued. They removed the hormone pessary which was covered in some sort of gross bodily crap…but they said that was normal. Still not contracting ‘enough’ or dilating. Hours pass and during my observations they notice I was tachycardic, but I told them I have a history of anxiety and was nervous so it was likely to be that. Tuesday afternoon a Doctor pays me a visit and does an ECG to see what is going on with my heart rate.  She says she's not concerned about there being anything actually wrong with my heart. Tuesday night was horrendous, I was wiping the crap I mentioned before each time I went to the toilet but as a first time mum just assumed that was what happened. The contractions were becoming unbearable, they were slowly upping the pain killers but it wasn’t even touching the pain. I was starting to panic how I would cope as they said I still wasn’t in established labour, all I could worry about was how bad real labour would be, considering the pain I was already in. They were still concerned about my heart rate and thought I wasn’t drinking enough and may be dehydrated, giving me jugs of water to drink, despite I was drinking enough anyway.

The night shift was coming to an end and the midwife said to me she didn’t think I would’ve dilated much, offered to examine me but said there wouldn’t be much point. So I agreed and said not to bother. A few hours later, just as we’re getting ready for breakfast a shift leading midwife pops in, the same lady who started the induction. She examines me and says, ‘did you know your waters have gone?’ I replied ‘oh have they?’ as I was told when I thought they had…they hadn’t. The midwife went on to say there’s meconium, and asked if I had noticed, so I explained I had seen it but didn’t think anything of it as the midwife who saw the same, or extremely similar substance wasn’t concerned. She explained that it could be because I was overdue and babies start to become stressed, and that I would be taken down to delivery when there was a bed available.

Quickly after, she returned and whisked me off to the delivery suite where I met the new midwife who’d be looking after me. I was so happy to finally be in delivery, my first words are ‘can I have the drugs now?. I was so tired, I had been in pain for 24 hours and barely slept, observations every few hours and barely eaten. The midwife administered pethidine and gave me the gas and air. I literally didn’t let go of the gas and air lol. The process is a bit of a blur still, as I was ill…not that I knew this. I opened my eyes to 1 Consultant, 2 doctors and 3 midwives standing around my bed to ‘say hello’. I wasn’t convinced. I knew they had messed up by not listening to me about my waters, and we were past the 24 hour deadline of when things start to get dangerous. They stood there and were bickering about what symptoms should be treated with what and eventually put me on IV fluids and antibiotics. My midwife explained to my birthing partners that if in case of emergency, there was a big reg button by my bed and how to use it. She told us that because of the meconium there would need to be a paediatrician on hand when Ivy was born in case she needed resuscitating.  That in itself was enough to send my blood pressure through the roof (they medicated me for that too). I asked if I was able to eat and the consultant made it very clear I could not eat or drink, and I knew from watching countless episodes of One Born Every Minute that she thought I would need a c-section. They said how I had a certain amount of time to dilate and give birth naturally or I’d have an emergency c-section, this was a while into the process. The oxytocin drip I was on was making Ivy’s heart rate rise so they had to turn that off, so I was relying completely on my body doing its job and dilating itself. I opted for an epidural because I couldn’t cope any more and they said it may slow the labour down, but I didn’t care at this point. It didn’t even work. Still felt everything.

11 hours after entering delivery I have a sudden urge to poo (tmi..) and told the new consultant I felt like I needed to push. The consultant didn’t seem to think I would be at that point yet, and said ‘I wasn’t going to examine you for another couple hours’ but lo and behold, I was finally 10cm dilated (hooray)! After an hours pushing Ivy-Willow entered the world, covered in poo. Once they could see she didn’t have any trouble breathing I got to hold her for the first time. Then she pooed on me, too. Y’know, inside me wasn’t enough. Tom and my mum went home to get some more bits for our now 3-day-stay at the hospital. There I was, after being in labour for the good part of 36 hours…they’ve shoved a paracetamol up my back side, taken my new baby to the NICU so she could have her treatment for sepsis and I’m just laying there…alone. Can’t move, starving hungry, nobody around waiting for someone to bring me toast, and it was cold.

Ivy and I had out temperatures checked, IV given and blood pressure checked every few hours for three days. Its crazy to think that if they had listened to me none of it may have ever happened, but I am grateful that they took no time in waiting around before starting anti-biotics. Nobody ever explained to us what the infection was, or why we needed to be watched so closely. I remember Ivy having her blood taken and I just started crying, the baby blues that you usually experience in the comfort of your own home, started after seeing her be poked and prodded time and time again. It wasn’t until I got home and read my hospital notes that it said we were being treated for sepsis.

The stress didn’t end there though, once we got home we both ended up getting another infection due to the anti-biotics. Sorry to have gone on for so long, but it’s really important you make your voice heard. I wish I had listened to my body more and spoke up, health care professionals are over stretched and do get things wrong. So, take the time and learn about sepsis.

Read more from Jo at: 

Parenting is hard. Really hard. There are up's and down's. We do so much to protect our children, from the moment they are in our belly till our last breath. Unfortunately there are some things that are out of our control. I've read a few stories recently where parents have lost their children. Each time you read a story like that your heart breaks, but then after becoming a parent and reading something like that it hits you. it hits you hard. You can never feel what these parents go through, but you understand. We are parents. Parents who are reading every parents worst fear. I never know what to say if someone tells me about a loss of a child, its such a taboo subject, but it shouldn't be. I sometimes feel it best to listen, listen to them remember and live every memory again. We lost our first baby at 12 weeks pregnant. We were heartbroken, but it's not until you go through something like that, that you realise that it happens to so many women, yet you never hear of it unless you have physically gone through it. I don't get it? I remember a work colleague had lost her baby to cot death at 4 months old, i came back to work following our missed miscarriage and she was the only one that came upto me and say "i can't imagine what you are going through, i am so sorry" i just stared at her, my heart sunk. After what she had been through she was so compassionate, why? because she is a mum. A mum to a beautiful angel.

We were blessed and went on to have two perfect baby boys. Again, you don't realise how lucky you are to be able to conceive and carry a child naturally. We have friends who are going through their second round of IVF, as they were telling me what they have to go through, a pang of guilt ran through me. Guilt that i have been lucky to fall pregnant with my two boys naturally, that Grayson wasn't planned and he just happened, and i feel like shit when i say that to people, especially people who struggle to fall. I think end up sitting there thinking about how i take it for granted. I feel selfish. I know my friend will probably read this and think I'm a wally, but my heart goes out to them, every single person who has to go through so much for something i sometimes take for granted on a daily basis.

I'm not sure what the reason for this post is, it's just something that has played on my mind.

There is so much judgement around parenting. It's so wrong and puts so much pressure and anxiety on mums. Whether you had a natural birth or c-section, whether you bottle feed of breast feed, co-sleep or put baby in their cot, jar feed or make all your dinners from scratch, use organic food or freezer food, rememeber this. You are perfect. You have come into parenthood blind sighted - no one prepares you for what happens once you get your baby home. Your children adore you, you are their queens. As long as you and your children are happy thats all that matters. Screw society, do what's right for you and your baby. Not anyone else.

Anyone can judge from the outside, but until their living it, their opinion is nothing.

A x

I am a stay at home mum. I has two boys aged 4 and 2 and a crazy cockapoo. Married to my soul mate. Welcome to our fun parenting life, follow us for all our ups and downs.  Read more from me at:

We have all seen the baby milestone cards, baby’s first smile, first tooth, first steps. This got me thinking about all the mummy milestones.

The difference between baby and mummy milestones is that the baby ones are things you are expecting to celebrate, I mean who was not the proudest parent when your little bundle of joy gave you their first gummy smile. Mummy milestones on the other hand our completely different……..

1. Using the bathroom alone.This one I am still waiting to happen, but I’ve been told it will happen eventually and it is A.M.A.Z.I.N.G. I can not wait to have a pee in peace without the threenager, the cat or the husband coming to see what I am doing.

2. Using a bag for just my crap. Do you remember those pre child days where your handbag only contained the essentials, phone, purse, keys and Lippy. Now my handbag resembles Mary Poppins magic bag. I can’t tell you the amount of times I have pulled a pull-up out of my bag in the Tesco que when looking for my purse.

3. Going to bed at a normal hour. How many of you mummies stay up much later then you should just to get some much needed “me time”. I often stay up until some stupid hour to watch “just one more episode” or find myself dicking around on Facebook/Instagram and instantly regret it when the 6am alarm clock is poking me in the head telling me the sun is up.

4. Wearing something that isn’t stretchy or practical. My wardrobe mainly consists of leggings, stretchy jeans and stripped tops, the standard mummy uniform. When you wear something fitted and smart you feel like a new woman even if you haven’t washed your hair for 5 days and still have Mondays make up on.

5. Doing a food shop without anyone throwing a tantrum. Remember those days before kids when the weekly shop was a chore and you dreaded it? Well doing the weekly shop with a tired/hungry/grumpy 3 year old is a new kind of hell. There is shouting (me) tears (sometimes me) and general frustration (also me). But sometimes your darling hubby whispers those magic words to you “I’ll stay at home with the kid you go shopping” These magic words have the same effect as Tom Hardy saying he is going to cook you dinner naked. 2 WHOLE hours alone, browsing oh how I have missed browsing. Actually having time to think about what you need instead of grabbing random stuff in a blind panic just so you can get out without a scene being caused!

I’m hopeful that one day in the not to distant future I will have achieved all my milestones but at the moment I’d be happy with using the bathroom in peace!

I’d love to hear your mummy milestones.

Mummy Em x

Emma is a mama of one curly haired little girl called Chloe. Married to Mr D. Working full time and trying to juggle everything ????  Read more from her at:

Facebook.com/mummyemblog

Body Positivity, this is a subject that I feel quite strongly about so I wanted to get involved and tell my story. Did you know that 71% of women have received negative comments about their post baby bodies? With family members and strangers being the most common culprits.

When I was pregnant, It took me a while to get used to my ‘new body’. I did definitely struggle at first to accept the changes, I felt like I had no control over my weight gain and I actually put on 2 stone when I was pregnant with my daughter. Before I fell pregnant, I hated my body – I was very underweight, I thought I was fat, I felt ugly.. I was receiving help for my mental health issues when I found out I was pregnant, and after I had gotten round to the idea of having a baby, I started to fall in love with my body. I felt like I finally had a purpose in life and the horrible thoughts of ‘not eating’ and ‘not looking after myself’ slowly went away. Being pregnant helped me immensely, it helped me feel more confident about my body and a lot more positive about my future. 

Despite suffering with a severe anxiety disorder and feeling like “everybody was staring at me” when I walked through the street, I felt more confident in myself. Being a young mum and having my baby at just aged 17, I felt like people would judge me and I’m sure they did.. At first, my dad and my brother both resented me, I didn’t have much contact with either of them for a while and I felt like this was maybe the worst decision I had ever made. However, they soon came round to the idea and realised just how much of a different person I had become since falling pregnant and now I am closer than ever with both my dad and my brother, which is amazing.

Becoming a young mum made me feel like it was ‘wrong’ to enjoy my pregnancy and because of this I feel like I didn’t really enjoy it as much as I should have done. I was constantly worrying about what other people thought instead of thinking about what was best for me. Next time around, I really hope to enjoy my pregnancy a lot more, take more pictures and document it on the blog. I am looking forward to falling pregnant again with baby number 2.

Since having my daughter in February last year, I feel like I have lost confidence again. I wasn’t mentally prepared for the amount of changes that would be happening to my body. When I was pregnant I actually got rid of all of my old clothes, pre-pregnancy I was a very small size 6, whilst I was pregnant I put on 2 stone and shot up to a size 12/14. I was convinced that I would be this size forever, however after giving birth I instantly went back to a size 10. Standing in front of the mirror for the first time after giving birth is scary, I felt so different and not like myself. It was almost as if I was looking at a completely different person. It took me a long time to adjust to my new figure and it took me a fair few months to get back into my size 8 body and after feeling crap about my body for months on end, I finally went out and bought myself some clothes that fit.

It has now been nearly 16 months since I gave birth to my daughter, the time has absolutely flown by and I am still not overly confident about my body, however I am learning to love it a little bit more. My post baby body is completely different to my pre-baby body but I am slowly learning to accept that.  So, what has changed? Everything has changed and I feel like there are a lot of things that you don’t get warned about. I now have a ‘mum tum’ which I’m not a fan of, before having a baby I had quite a tight stomach.. there was no ‘flab’ on me and I had what I now see as a flat stomach. Now I have a mum tum, a tummy with excess skin. My boobs have changed, when I was pregnant and after having my little girl – they were huge & that is one thing I actually liked about myself, although they were uncomfortable at times, I felt like my clothing looked nicer and my body looked more even. I stopped breastfeeding after just 2 weeks and since my milk dried up, my boobs are now non-existent. Pancakes. Again, not a fan of those either. Although I only managed to feed my baby myself for a short 2 weeks, I still managed it and I am proud of that. 

My body is a completely different shape to what it used to be, I’m not as skinny looking.. I feel better about that however I feel more chunky now. My legs are bigger and my hips are wider, I gained lots of stretch marks towards the end of my pregnancy, around my boobs, my tummy and on the insides of my legs. Postpartum hair loss has been a big problem for me too, before having a baby I could wash my hair and not batter an eye lid but now at 16 months postpartum, I wash my hair and half of it falls out. I am actually starting to go bald in some places which is quite embarrassing but I am doing the best I can to keep my hair in good condition and prevent it from falling out, although I am aware that this isn’t really something you can stop completely. Unfortunately I have suffered / am still suffering with postnatal depression, which is something that a lot of mums go through and this has had a huge impact on my confidence.

“Stretchmarks are the markings of a mother”

Don’t get me wrong, I am so so grateful for my body and I love that my body has housed my baby, I still can’t quite believe that I gave birth to a baby but the transition between body changes is something that a lot of us struggle with especially first time mums. As you can tell, I’m quite self conscious about my Mama Figure post baby and overall I have found the transitions extremely hard to deal with but I am slowly learning to love my postpartum body. Finally! As I said at the start of this post, Channel Mum’s topic this week is all about body positivity and they have encouraged mums (like myself) to get involved. Research shows that 85% of mums want their postpartum bodies to be celebrated. 62% of women want celebrities like Kim Kardashian to be more honest.

There is no shame in being confident & proud of your body, your body grew an actual human being, how amazing is that! You should be proud! You are amazing, you look amazing and you have done an amazing thing. 

I am passing this message onto all of you lovely mums out there today so that we can start feeling a little bit better about ourselves. These are not photo’s that I ever thought I would share on the internet but I wanted to show you all that its okay to not be body confident, it’s okay to have stretchmarks and a saggy tummy.. it’s okay to be honest.

Do you feel confident in your body after having a baby?

Thanks for reading,

Zoe x

Dear New Mum

My story is probably very different from yours and you’re probably feeling things right now that I never had to face. You see, River wasn’t diagnosed with Down syndrome until he was 6 months old, it was missed by medical professionals and strangely I often feel very grateful for that. I feel that way because throughout my pregnancy and for the newborn baby period I was just incredibly happy. I wasn’t overloaded with scary medical advice, or told that my baby would have a terrible life, or that it was unfair on the siblings, or that I should have a termination. Nobody told me they were sorry. I suspected River had Down syndrome when he was born, but I was assured by doctors and midwives that he was fine. Even after that I think I still knew deep down, but I clung to the fact that everyone told me otherwise and put it to the back of my mind. Or at least I tried to. Either way, for the first 6 months of River’s life he was just my beautiful newborn baby, without a diagnosis and I fell head over heels in love with him.

I always wonder whether I’m the right person to be dishing out advice to new parents, whether they learn during pregnancy or at birth. It may sound a bit strange but I often feel a bit left out, a bit on the sidelines because I missed out on such a huge part of having a child with Down syndrome. I never had that life shattering moment of sadness, that moment where you feel like your life will never be happy again. I just didn’t feel it, and the only thing I can put it down to is the fact that I had already gotten to know my son and just knew it was all going to turn out ok. And I guess that because I had suspected and known deep down that River had Down syndrome, that I’d already in some way processed those feelings without them really bubbling to the surface.

But I do understand. I do understand the sadness you feel and the fear that you have, because I know I would have felt exactly the same way. I know I would have felt devastation, I know I would have felt angry and I know I would have felt unable to cope or see a happy ending. I know I would have felt lost, not knowing which way to turn and how to make things ok again. I know that I would have felt like a failure, that I’d failed my family and that I had failed my new baby. I even know that I would have felt guilty for feeling everything that I was feeling.

What I thought I knew couldn’t have been more wrong

I would have pictured Down syndrome and imagined the outdated and false stereotypical vision that so many of us within society believe. In my mind I would have seen a lonely adult, with no friends, old fashioned clothing, with no understanding and always with their elderly mother. It would have been so wrong and now I can see how views of Down syndrome within society couldn’t be further from the truth, but I’m being honest and that’s how I would have felt. I would have pictured my son as a man without any type of ‘normal’ existence, a man who could never feel true feelings, and a man who would never have anything to offer society or who society would never accept. I would have seen a bleak and grey existence for the life I had wanted to create so much, and I would have wondered if it would be kinder for him to never have existed at all.

It breaks my heart that I know I would have felt this way, and I know for sure that I never would have pictured River as a man who could lead a fulfilling life. I can now tell you though, that everything I never would have been able to picture for my son, I hand on heart picture it all for him now. With honesty I can tell you that when I think of River’s future I see him with some form of independence, with a circle of friends, with a job, with hobbies, with passions, with ambitions and with love. I envision a school life full of childhood friendships and an ability to learn along with a love of it. I can see a life filled with travel, a life filled with adventure and a life full of substance.

I’m ashamed to say it now, but before I knew what I know now, I never would have thought my son’s life could be meaningful, or anything other than just sad and disappointing. I can tell you without any uncertainty that I never would have been able to imagine the feisty, determined, funny, cheeky, sweet, loving, adventurous, fearless, smart, mischievous, social, amazing and totally gorgeous little boy we have been blessed with. I never would have imagined our River.

I know you’re feeling a huge sense of loss – I get it

I may not have the initial diagnosis in common with you, but something I’m sure you are feeling is a sense of loss. I know as I felt this loss myself, and I can only compare it as a sense of mourning for the life that you had pictured in your mind for your child. A sense of mourning the life you thought they were going to have. That life that you had let yourself imagine doesn’t exist anymore and it’s a deep feeling of sadness, it can even be compared to a death. We’ve lost the life that we thought our child would live, it’s just not going to happen and that is hard to bare. We all do it as parents, picture a life of milestones, education, careers, marriage, children, etc. We picture our future grandchildren and the life that society has decided we should all lead. We all have our children’s lives practically mapped out before they are even born and when we feel like it’s been ripped away from us it hurts. It hurts and it takes time for those feelings of loss to heal, it takes time for us to move on from those emotions.

What I can tell you though is this. You will move on and it is all going to be ok, in fact, it is going to be incredible. The loss you are feeling right now will pass. The sadness, the hurt, the fear and the pain will all pass and you will see a light. You will get to know your baby and you will soon come to realize what a blessing you have been given. You will soon learn that you are one of the lucky few, and that your child is exactly what you never even knew you wanted or needed. You will get to a point where you won’t want to change it even if you could.

It won’t be easy, but the best things never are

I’m not for one minute saying it’s going to be easy, it won’t be. You will face hurdles and barriers, and you will have days where it all feels too much. You will worry about your child’s future and you will worry about their acceptance within society. You will worry about their health and you may face dark periods where your child faces illness. You may feel frustrations regarding development and you will without a doubt feel a frustration about the struggles of receiving services they are entitled to. But I promise you this, those worries and fears are nothing compared to the sheer joy your child will bring to your life. You will feel an overwhelming sense of pride and admiration, and you will become their biggest supporter. Your child will show you the world through new eyes and you will become a better person, becoming more accepting of others and really seeing a person for who they really are. You will embrace differences and you will want to teach others to do the same, you will want to make a better society for your family. You will become stronger than you ever thought you could be, you will find a voice that you never knew you had and you will fight with every last breath you have to create a better world for your child.  You will not be able to imagine your life any other way, or yourself on any other journey in life. Most of all you will feel lucky, and you will wonder why the hell you ever felt so lost or so sad.

So New Mum, my advice to you is this

Feel exactly what you need to feel and feel it without guilt. This is a journey for you, and it’s not an easy one. You need to feel these things in order to process them, deal with them and come out the other side. But you will come out the other side, you will get stronger and your life will be beautiful. Your child will shock you, teach you and you will burst with pride every single day. Your life will be filled with love, laughter and adventure and you will adore your child. You will love your child, you will love your life and you will love Down syndrome. You may not believe me right now, but one day you will love Down syndrome. It is part of your child, and it is the part that will show you what life is really about and what is really important. Believe me when I tell you this, one day it will be a part that you wouldn’t want to change in a million years.

Good luck and Love Always

From a Mum who is a little further into this wonderful journey.